Ah, Sloth. My old friend. A little shallow introspection brought on the obvious realization that yes, I am indeed a slave to Sloth.

But Sloth is the happiest of the Seven Deadly Sins. Like gambling and prostitution, it's a victimless crime.

Followers of the Cult of Sloth tend to be annoyingly hyper when they're not asleep. This is usually late at night, when those afflicted with lust are busy and those afflicted with the other five sins are fast asleep.

Sloth is why I've been wearing the same underwear and pajamas for the last three days.

Sloth is why I never followed through with a lawyer to get my $700 deposit back from my charming former landlords.

Sloth is why I have huge piles of paper stacked up around my life.

The beauty of Sloth is that you always have an acceptable excuse: "I was too busy." Being busy is always Sloth's alibi, and Sloth's followers always have it on the tips of their tongues. And since slothful people spend a great deal of time alone in their homes, there's never anyone to disprove them.